One a day

Recently I have been helping Auntie KY at the resource centre. As I was sorting the books, I chanced upon this very interesting book. It was a comics on soccer humor. I browsed thru it and had a good laugh in the very very quiet resource centre! So I specially selected some to scan and share with my PINKIE boy, since he loves soccer. 

Today as I was scanning the pages, I told myself that I should send 1 comics at a time. So there will be something that he can anticipate everyday. This will help to keep him away from the negative thoughts and redirect his attention on constructive things. So as I thought of this, I suddenly recalled something, or rather someone ...

Years ago, I have this male colleague which has lots of Forever Friends Bear pictures. Knowing that I'm a BIG fan of FFB, he sent me 1 picture a day and this last for around 1-2 mths. At that time, I didnt particularly like him and neither did he like me. Our relationship was just a little deeper than colleagues but not deep enough to be classify as good friends.

Now that I can still recall this after so many years, I still think it's a very sweet thing that one can offer to do for another person. Anyway, nothing much happen between us. All I can say is that fellow is a 高手 and I'm not stupid either! hahaha ... ! :D

Jokes of the year 2009

26 Nov was a very important day for all P6s cos it was the day to release PSLE results. While myself, mrs C (form teacher of my class) and mrs L were waiting in the conference room for the Big Shots to return with the results, L asked C & me if anyone in my class will fail Math. C mentioned 2 names, which I got a shock because I didnt anticipate any failures at all. And then C added that she anticipated 4 A* for Math, which I nearly fell from chair cos at most, there should only be 2 A*.

So when the Big Shots were back with the results, there was 1 A* and no failure for Math. It was really hilarious that being a form + Math teacher, her judgement was inaccurate! Anyway the highest was only 233. There were a few who did exceptionally well but overall speaking, it was lower than my expectation. The Foundation stream did very well this year.

So when everyone received their results, there were 3 meltdowns in my class. My dear form teacher wasnt aware of the meltdown. She was so busy going around, getting students to write greeting cards for hamper (another social enterprise proj in my sch)! Until I had to handle 2 boys and when they were calm enough to have lunch, I got to secretly call her to inform her. These 2 boys have history to commit suicide so she as a form teacher got to be aware of it.

So after I told her, she together with another theraptist, talked to the boys. I purposely left the boys with them. In less than 10 mins, they had finished talking. So I joined the boys at their workstation and one of them commented that, "why is C so concern about us today?"

I thought this statement is very classic. Even a child with autism can sense if a person is real or fake! I wouldnt say I'm a good teacher. But the last thing I want is my student to remember me as a fake person!

Recovering from a Broken Heart

Weeks ago I was praying very hard for my PINKIE boy. I even dreamt about the thing I prayed for. That dream had a positive outcome but reality bited us once again! I was very very dishearted. So dishearted that I didnt want to pray anymore.

I felt even worst when I knew my boy was so so so upset and started to self-hurt. As much as I wanted to help him, I didnt know how to cos I was feeling as upset and I didnt want to pass on those negative effects to him.

But God is good! As I started to stop praying, my boy kept throwing me new prayer requests. And thru out this period, I was closely watched over by my dearest mentor, Auntie KY. She has such POWERFUL eyes that are able to detach my emotional problems, even though I "die die also never spell a single word about it"! Haha ... :D

While I'm trying to cope with the disappointment, my mind is very occupied with the problems I can foresee for 2 of my boys (D & J). Since I can't be with them forever, I have to learn to detach! Although there are more to be done, I have done more than sufficient.

I need to quickly recover from my broken heart. Be recharge and ready for the new challenges ahead of me!

Melt ...

One of the many things I have learnt after being a teacher is to apologise to my students. And one of the sweetest moment, being a teacher, is to know that my student is not angry with me when he has a valid reason. That's how he melts my heart!

PSLE results will be out in 2 days time. My melting heart is at the same time, pumping very fast. That dream of mine is still clearly reflected in my mind. I don't know if it's from God. I only know that God must help him. I will also help him by praying for him so that God help him!!!

A moment of thanksgiving!

As I discover a small portion of hidden secret, I thought I have comprehend the entire plan but I was wrong! It's another prayer answer and the answer is STAY! I want to thank God for revealing the answer in such amazing way. Even as I was excited over the little tracks along the way, He know my desire and kept me in track. Indeed, He has solved the problem for me. Walking away isn't the solution. He has amazingly made the problem disappear in the most amazing way!

Today, I discover that it is not yet time to say goodbye. There'll be more good times to come and of course bad times when I will feel weak, ill, sad, disappointed, dishearted, ... etc. I know He is always with me. He has never leave me a single step, a single moment in my life.

I want to dedicate this moment to Him, to thank Him for the many wonderful things He has done in my life thus far! 

Thank you Jesus!

Not ready to bid farewell 还不想说再见 ...

I have been asked by a few students if I will teach them next year but it's particularly sweet & encouraging to hear it from danny boy!  It's indeed my pleasure that receive such request cos if they dun like me, they wouldnt raise so queries. 

This academic year is ending soon. There are things that I can wait to wave goodbye with yet some that I cant bear to part with! I will miss those kids who God has clearly revealed to me. As much as I want to shadow them, I know there will be a time that we have to part. And I always believe that we will meet again somewhere that God permits!

To my danny boy,

When you asked me if I will teach you next year, my heart was immediately soften cos you had brought up on the little secret in the deepest corner in my heart. Although you're not the first student to ask this question, it's extremely sweet and encouraging to hear it from you!

I know I have yet to reply you on your second question. I'm not trying to act hard-to-get! I just feel that I'm not ready to bid farewell with you. Yet I know we need to part somewhere in our lives. It's a struggle for me which I dun know how to share with you! I guess I can only commit this to the Lord. Only He knows where we will be heading next year. 

No matter what, we need to part somewhere. Dun be sad! Remember our everlasting promise? We will meet again and continue our soccer session! Remember to put on your outfit and get ready to play soccer with me in heaven!

Dun doubt! You're a WONDERFUL boy cos God has made you so! Meanwhile, I will continue to pray for you till the day PSLE results is out.

Faith Love Hope

I still was joking with Fatty Bomb a while ago that I havent been writting not becos I havent been thinking. In fact, I have been thinking a lot recently ... a lot more than I had a year ago! But writting down these thoughts need a lot of time, effort and also inspiration!

I was chatting and sharing with my insurance agent in the afternoon about my work and my kids, in general. I always like to talk to him cos he will listen attentively with no expectation and link back the topic to God! As I was sharing that the demand for special need children is increasing and the trend will change in the near future, he asked for my opinion why God allow such mistake in man? 

Frankly, I was caught off guard with this question. I felt a bit shaken! I have been thinking about this topic, esp when I see those kids whom I love soooo much are in deep pain! Tears will just roll down from my eyes when I don't get an answer. No matter how much tears I shed, the God I know is still the same God yesterday, today and forever. My kids will still have to struggle with autism till the day the leave this world. I don't have an answer. 

Mayb cos I don't have to know or I already have the answer. Between these, I choose the second one --- The answer is already given! God is Love and for those who honour Him, walk close with Him, will receive be blessed! With Him, we can! 

So I choose to believe that the answer is very simple, which is Faith, Love & Hop!